Today, my heart still aches . . . .

Posted by Talema Mason on

A year ago today, the world was pulled out from in-under me. When you get married and you repeat the vows that the two of you will become one, it sounds romantic. You go about building a life together, having children, fussing every now and then, taking care of each other when you feel bad, talking about your day or your future, holding each other up when the ground beneath you is shaking and then one day, the vow you never wanted to think about comes true, "till death do you part". All of a sudden, you're alone. You're not whole - part of you is gone and you realize what those words meant, "two shall become one". After 41 years, how do you do this alone? You no longer know who you are or who you're supposed to be. The plans that were made will never come to pass, not the way they were supposed to. Making decisions all of a sudden becomes a monumental, impossible task. The silence is deafening, until you lay your head down to sleep. Your world is off-kilter and there's nothing you can do about it. You thought you'd experienced heartache before but this - this is something beyond words. Today, my heart still aches, my tears still flow and I still don't have words to express how much I miss my missing half. There are a few things I do know - God is faithful. He will continue to see me through this. I know that Glenn has seen the face of God and is praising Jesus. He's no longer struggling with health issues, he's been healed and is able to walk. I have no doubt that our son, Adam, met him at the gates! And I know that one day, I will see them both again. I am blessed with children who have always been willing to help me when I ask (well, at least since they've become adults anyway) and they have really stepped up this past year. But that doesn't change the fact that I know I couldn't have walked this road if it wasn't for the strength and grace of God. My friend, this life is filled with trouble and strife, headaches and heartaches. You don't have to carry the weight of this life by yourself. Jesus is waiting for you to ask for His help. Why wait any longer?    Talema and Glenn, 07/01/21

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